Letting go
by xOerbaDiaVanillex
Summary: The arrangement had been 'until they reunited' with Lightning/Yeul. Somewhere along the way- that line became blurred. (Noel x Hope)


_It started out of 'needs'. _That's how he'd justified it, but in the end he was just being arrogant. They'd both missed someone, _Lighting. Yeul. _It was stupid and foolish to project 'love' onto another. Especially a 'relationship' of this sort, it was unorthodox.

It should have never happened. Because, slowly but surely- he found himself lost in the idea that it could be something real. Naive to have started this, at all. Somewhere the 'need' became 'affection'. That annoying little assistant made his hands ball at his side.

And that was what made him resort to biting. In order to 'mark' _his _territory.

"Hope, where'd you get that from?" Alyssa asked curiously, as she all but hung off of him. Blinking as she examined it, a bit of the color drained from her face. Had he had another girl over?

"Get what?" Hope asked, as he walked over to his desk, flipping through papers. "I'm a bit busy, Alyssa."

"Who bit you?" Alyssa asked.

Noel smirked, as he leaned coolly against the wall.

"Bit?" Hope asked, "What do you mean?" he still didn't catch on to what she meant.

"Right here!" Alyssa touched his exposed neck.

"Ouch." Hope recoiled, "What the..?" it hurt. Like a bruise. _That.. _he grit his teeth, looking over at Noel, who looked overly innocent.

"Something on your mind?" Noel asked, as he noticed Hope coming closer.

"Did he have a girl over?" Alyssa asked Noel, curiously.

"Not that I know of." Noel shrugged, as Hope grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him out of the office.

"What the hell is this?" Hope demanded, he had no patience for childish antics today.

"This? What do you mean?" Noel asked, head cocked to the side, as he stared at Hope.

"Don't give me that." Hope frowned, "Noel." his jaw clenched as he saw himself in the mirror. "It's black. And probably infected."

"Heat of the moment." Noel shrugged, brushing it off as nothing.

"Liar." Hope splashed water on it, examining the area more thoroughly. "This isn't 'in the moment'. This is something else, more childish and stupid."

"I'm only 18. Why would I be _childish _and _stupid_?" Noel asked, acting indignant.

Hope sighed, "Noel. What is it- you want from me?" he looked over at the brunette.

"I don't know." Noel admitted, sometimes it was clear what he did in fact want. Others, it became hazy, a blurred line. He remembered why this started, but it couldn't be stopped. _Lightning _was his obstacle. _Yeul _had become.. something else.

"So. If I have this correctly." Hope fixed his outfit, as he stared at Noel "You're giving me a hickey- biting _this _hard without any justification? Don't think I didn't see the big dumb smirk on your face when Alyssa mentioned it- either!" he was fuming.

"Yeah, well." Noel felt like a kicked dog, he hated being scolded. He wasn't a child. But Hope always had to bring that into things. Glancing away, "You'll replace me, when she's back." he blurted it out, hadn't meant to. It was one of the 'terms' that went unsaid. He was the temporary 'replacement'.

"She-?" Hope blinked, "_Lightning_?" he asked. "Noel. Look at me." he said sternly, frowning in frustration when he didn't listen. His patience was wearing thin and Hope turned Noel's head to make him look. "Isn't that what you- _we_ wanted out of this?" he was confused.

"That's how it started." Noel couldn't argue with it. "But somehow, it's different." he admitted.

"Noel. I can't _explain _or tell you what you want to hear. Without knowing _what _it is you want. You're conflicted about it, and that's obvious." Hope pointed out, as he tried to put it all together. He'd toss Yeul/Lightning aside for _this_?

"You." Noel didn't hesitate, as stared at Hope. "That's what I want. Yeah, I may be a kid.. I may be stupid compared to you. But.. this is what I want!" he knew Hope would reject him. And, he was prepared for that. Or so he thought. It felt like his legs could give way. Or that he'd cry.

"Noel." Hope smiled softly, chuckling a bit. "What about Lightning/Yeul?" he asked, "Are you willing to give her up?"

"Are _you_?" Noel turned the question on Hope "You can laugh at me- all you want! It's obvious to me, you don't care at all."

"I'm not laughing at you." Hope stated, as he let go of Noel's face. "Yes- I laughed a bit. But that wasn't at _you_. I was thinking. Laughing at how preposterous this whole thing is."

_This man, is cruel. _Noel turned on his heels, "You're right." he agreed, "What was I thinking?" he strode forward, a jerk to his wrist stopped him. He looked over at Hope.

"You don't deal with emotion well." Hope sighed softly, "Noel. I'm sorry." he noticed the younger male crying, and hugged him.

"For what?" Noel asked, he felt the sting of bitter tears.

"Making you cry." Hope said, "I'm sorry." he repeated.

"I'm not crying!" Noel insisted, trying to shove him away.

"Yes, yes. You have a delayed reaction to specks of dust or irritants within your eyes. It's only coincidence that it began now, of all times." Hope still hugged him, "I'm not letting go. If that's what you think."

"You're freakishly strong for someone so slender!" Noel hated how frail his voice sounded. _Very cruel, indeed. _

"And you're just strong- period. I have bruises that still haven't faded, you know?" Hope asked, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

Noel laughed for a moment, but stopped. "Sorry." he'd stopped crying. "Can you let me go?" he asked. "I'd rather.. not be here, right now. Ending it like this is fine. I won't come around other than necessary."

"You're still not hearing me correctly." Hope said, as he let go and stared into Noel's eyes. "When did I say 'get lost' or 'it's over'?" he asked.

_He hadn't. _That revelation swept over Noel, true he'd assumed it was happening. "But! You just- I mean. Isn't that what this is?" he asked, "'Goodbye'?"

"No." Hope shook his head, "Don't tell me you're dumping me, for someone else?" he asked, with a humored smile.

"No." Noel frowned, "I tell you 'I love you' and you play games with me? You're a jerk."

"You never.. said that." Hope blinked, "Love, huh?"

Noel flushed a slight pink, "Nevermind!" he shook his head "It was a joke! I was kidding!" he insisted, trying to take it back.

"Really? I was kind of hoping it was serious. Because if you were, then I was going to say something. And then- I thought you'd want to be alone with me. Maybe it's just my imagination running wild." Hope walked past Noel, to the door.

"Wait!" Noel was interested now, "Say what?! Do what!?" he asked.

"Depends. Were you being serious with me?" Hope knew the answer, but he wanted to hear it escape the hunter's lips.

"Yes." Noel admitted it, feeling embarrassed and out of place. Betraying his normally cool demeanor.

"Good. Because then I'd feel like an idiot- if I said I 'loved you, too'." Hope smiled over his shoulder.

_Huh? _Noel blinked, staring into Hope's eyes, asking if what he'd heard had been true. He swallowed nervously, in the silence.

"Feel better?" Hope asked.

Noel grinned, "Yeah. But now- you're not getting any work done for the rest of the day."

"The entire day?" Hope raised a brow "It's early."

"And you're mine. I already claimed you, you know?" Noel asked, his cocky attitude back, as he grabbed Hope by the wrist and lead him off.

"That right?" Hope smiled, back to normal.

"I'm not letting you leave- even if you ask me to." Noel said flatly, as he shut the door to Hope's private sleeping quarters.

"Oh?" Hope asked, "And what if- I don't know. Zombies rise? What then?"

"Zombies?" Noel asked, "Are there zombies? Should we be out there- helping people!?" he was worried.

"I was joking." Hope snorted, laughing at Noel.

"I'll get you back for that." Noel said.

"I got a bit of Lightning's sense of humor." Hope said, apologetically. Frowning slightly, he'd said her name and Noel stopped at the mention of her.

Noel frowned, "Yeah? Well. I can do better than Lightning."

"It wasn't a challenge." Hope said, a bit nervous. What did he mean?

Noel shrugged, as he worked on Hope's clothing. He didn't want to hear 'Lightning' come out of Hope's mouth for a while. Those lips- were to call out his name in ecstasy. Not murmur about a girl he knew centuries earlier.

"You're the very jealous type." Hope looked down at his body. He'd be tender, for a while.

Noel slept beside him, soundly.

"And you have a strange amount of stamina." he added, the day- was over. His eyes shut, as he let sleep take him. Letting go, of Lightning..._could I do that? _One last thought, before he slept.


End file.
